Moving From Failed To Fulfilling Relationships

By Rex Newlands

Why should so many wonderful women feel that love has let them down?  I have known so many kind, compassionate, delightful women who are perpetually single.  Many seem to be uncomfortable with the concept of starting over and finding a new “significant other” in their lives. Some have been disappointed by divorce or death of a spouse. Others may not have found the perfect relationship or may not have been able to hold on to it.  Whatever the reason is, it is a great pity that so many terrific women can’t find a successful relationship.

If Every Guy Were Appropriately Trained …

Wouldn’t it be great if every guy had gone through training in relationship building and teamwork and by the time you met them they were trained and ready to go?

The truth is that we all need training in relationship building and teamwork. Relationships by definition are a team effort. Unfortunately very few of us have had any significant training in how to deal with relationships.

Much of our lifetime is devoted to training. Training from nursery school to graduate school. Training on the job. How much of that training is devoted to interpersonal skills? How much time is spent learning to be team players? How much emphasis is placed on preparing people for successful relationships?

The answer is very little.

Does The Absence Of Training Warrant Giving Up?

Definitely Not! Despite the absence of formal training in the art of successful relationships the good news is that the ability to have a successful relationship is completely attainable and clearly within reach.  It is the mix of the ingredients that determine the flavor. That is, the better suited the parties are for each other at the outset, the better chance for a successful relationship.  Just like cooking, even the best-suited ingredients left unattended cooking can turn and become bitter. Relationships cannot be left on autopilot. They require attention, nurturing and often revitalization.

So What Should I Do?

Look to build relationships with others who are well-suited to your personality. Understand who you are as a person. What are the most important elements of your personality that need to be satisfied in order for a relationship to work?

What Should I Look For In A Person?

Understanding who you are is the key to understanding whom you will likely get along with. The past, is just that, the past. Focus on the present and the future. What kind of man do you really need? What sort of person would truly be well-suited to you to allow that union to work well, flourish, and succeed?

How Do I Get Up After The Disappointments Of The Past?

Slowly, steadily and with the knowledge and confidence that you, and you alone, are your Captain and your future is yours. The first steps are the hardest, but also the most important. Life is about reinvention, learning from the past, and moving on.

Can I Love Again?

Love is a fundamental attribute of life. Of course, you can love and be loved again. The goal is to be prepared for love, receptive to love and willing to love and be loved.

When Is The Best Time To Start On This Journey?

When you feel you are ready.

 

About the Author

Rex Newlands is a medical doctor currently in practice. He has spent more than 25 years in the study and practice of medicine, has broad experience in medicine and has published basic science research papers in peer-reviewed journals.

Rex has written a book on relationships in which he has provided insights on how to develop and maintain successful romantic relationships.

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