With the holidays quickly approaching and spring in the air, let’s get entertaining!

If you want to do something well your first challenge is to make it look effortless … but we all know there’s nothing effortless about entertaining, now, is there?  Have you ever watched an Olympic gymnast pull off a routine error free?  You say to yourself “he or she made it ‘look’ sooo easy” … that’s exactly what we want to do when we entertain.

Preparation and organization are the two key elements when making entertaining look effortless.  A few simple steps to help make entertaining “look” easy are …

1. Decide who you will invite (head count)
2. Menu
3. Shopping List
4. Food preparation
5. Day Before Set Up/Day of Event
6. Dessert/Coffee

Ok, first things first. I put everything in my iPhone; therefore, I have all I need on me all the times.  Begin with items one and complete the list through item six as listed above.

You can prepare your main course anywhere from a month to a few days before a party.  Let’s say chicken piccata is the main dish.  This can be prepared up to a month before (then freeze).  If frozen make sure you give 2-3 days to defrost.  Or you prepare the dish a few days before which will not require freezing, of course.  Now the main course is done.

As for side dishes, they should be done the day before and be ready in the fridge in whatever dish they will be cooked and served in.  Tip: anything going in the oven should be taken out of the fridge and set out to reach room temperature.  Food cooks quicker when it is at room temperature, this is “key” when wanting to get your din-din on the table.

The night before any tables, buffet area along with a beverage area are set, put out any non-refrigerated snacks on different tables and counters.  Do as much as you can do the day before, it will lighten your load the day of your party.

“The day of” is about timing:

1. Prepare appetizers and refrigerate until a half-hour before guests arrive.
2. Make sure all drinks are chilled and ready to be served.
3. Place napkins and small plates wherever you have munchies.  People are always looking for a napkin.
4. Create a designated dessert area, use different tiered cake plated, domed if possible – it looks good with different heights.
5. Take the food out of the fridge one hour before it needs to go in the oven and place it on your stovetop. Now everything that needs to be cooked is in the same place.  It’s a good visual that looks impressive!
6. Know how long each dish needs to be in oven so you will know exactly what needs to go in first, second, third and last.  Desired goal is for everything to be done at the same time.
7. Once your din-din is on the table enjoy what God has blessed you with; food, family, friends, and of course, sharing your home.

I find entertaining extremely rewarding and a blessing that God has gifted us with that we can share with whomever we choose, or more importantly, whomever He chooses! I love using my home to bless others, what a delightful honor for me.

Most of all have fun and enjoy your company, they came because you invited them, be with them, love them. Effortless entertaining?  Not! Just simply make it “LOOK” effortless!

Photo credit: 123RF.com

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It is disturbing to learn how much ambivalence there is about the amount of chemicals and toxins that are absorbed through the skin and into our bodies from commonly used household and personal care products and cosmetics as well as exposure to contaminants in the produce and water we consume.  Infants are at an increased risk, since they have internal organs that are still growing, decreased body weight and immature immune systems.

It is alarming to see how many infants are being diagnosed with central nervous system disorders, cancers and heart problems.  The Environmental Working Group’s “Body Burden 2-the Pollution in Newborns Report,” states that researchers found an average of 200 industrial chemical and pollutants in the umbilical cords of 10 babies in U.S. hospitals even back in 2004.

All of us need to take a closer look at the various ways we can decrease the exposure of infants to the pollutants and carcinogens in both our home and in the outside environment.  Here are some practical ways to reduce the possible risks babies may be exposed to on a daily basis:

• Nutrition/Produce:  Buying completely organic can be very expensive for most households.  The Environmental Working Group has identified 12 fruits and vegetables that have the highest levels of pesticides.  This information can be found at http://www.kitchenstewardship.com/2010/04/29/2010-dirty-dozen-produce-list-released-by-the-ewg/

You may want to consider purchasing either pesticide free from the farmers markets or buy organic for these twelve items.

• Infant Products:  Also try to purchase Bisphenol A [BPA] free products.  BPA is commonly used in baby bottles and other drinking containers.  BPA is frequently used for the linings of cans.  Medical news from Med Page Today sites that researchers have confirmed that BPA increases the risk of cardiovascular disease.  In addition, watch out for the lead that could be in your child’s toys.  Go to this wonderful easy guide to learn more on how to avoid the hazardous ingredients and chemicals for children. http://www.cosmeticdatabase.com/special/parentsguide/

• Household Products:  Harmful toxins can be brought into our homes through our household cleaning products. The following web site will teach you about the hazardous substances to avoid when purchasing these products: http://www.leas.ca/Cleaners-and-Toxins.htm. When you get to this web site click on the cleaners and toxins guide.

• Drinking Water:   Do everything you can to prevent toxins in drinking water from affecting your newborn.  Consider installing a water filter to prevent the ingestion of heavy metals.  Google “water filter comparisons” to review the performance ratings of several top brands of water filters.

• Washing your hands:  Unless you are informed to maintain this practice by your health practitioner due to life threatening or high health risks at home, be cautious about using antibacterial hand soaps particularly those containing triclosan.  Read this important guide about the possible risks of triclosan…  http://www.ewg.org/files/EWG_triclosanguide.pdf

• Organic Products:  Just because ingredients are organic, they may not be free of health concerns and may still contain many harmful chemical ingredients.  Several toxic chemicals can still be present in ingredients that claim to be Organic, Natural or Green.  Remember to read all labels.   Making a concerted effort to choose at least a few items that are non toxic and non hazardous to your infant’s health could be one of the best decisions you ever make for your baby’s health care!

• Outside Toxins:  Minimize the use of insecticides and weed killers, since these toxic ingredients can get into our infants systems through inhalation and skin contact.  In addition, remove your shoes before coming into the house.  Lawns and inconspicuous toxins on the ground can be tracked into your home and remain there for long periods of time.

Since there are no restrictions or requirements for the safety testing of most products that we purchase, it is incumbent on us to be diligent on the products we purchase and bring into our homes that can affect our growing infants.  By educating ourselves and trying to embrace eco friendly lifestyle options, we can learn to reduce our exposure to the high number of questionably safe products and choose healthier alternatives.

http://www.medpagetoday.com/PublicHealthPolicy/PublicHealth/17921

http://www.ewg.org/files/EWG_triclosanguide.pdf

http://www.consumerreports.org/cro/consumer-protection/recalls-and-safety-alerts-5-08/plastic-ingredients-in-bottles-and-cans/recalls-plastic.htm

http://www.ewg.org/reports/bodyburden2/execsumm.php

http://antiagingchoices.com/infant_children/dirty_dozen_baby.htm

http://www.preventcancer.com/publications/pdf/Time%20to%20Protect%20Babies%20feb2805.htm

About the Author:

Linda Winkler Garvin, R.N., M.S.N., of Alameda, California, is a Nurse Health Advocate, Consultant and Educator in the Bay Area with expertise in patient advocacy, wellness, chronic health problems and pain management.  She gives you personalized attention in working toward your individual health circumstances and provides the necessary information and education for you to make well informed health decisions. She is the author of several articles on Pain Management, Healthy Lifestyles and Nutrition. Learn more at www.patientadvocatebayarea.com or e-mail at garvin_linda@yahoo.com.

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photo credit: Clare Bloomfield

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1. Good fit makes you fit. When choosing a bike, make sure the frame is appropriate.  To find the right fit, straddle the bike and stand flatfooted.  There should be at least one inch of clearance between your groin and the top tube and two inches on a mountain bike.

2. Location, location, location. The handlebars and seat should be positioned correctly for a comfortable, optimal ride.  The seat should be located high or low enough so each knee is bent only slightly at the bottom of each rotation.   Seats are not “one size fits all” and should be appropriate to your build and riding situation.

3. You’re not as hardheaded as you think. Always wear a helmet when you ride.  This simple rule protects you from head trauma and brain injury.  The helmet should have a bright, visible color and snug fit that covers as much of your head as possible.

4. Nighttime is not the right time. Avoid riding your bike at night.  Most cycling accidents occur between 6 p.m. and 9 p.m. when light levels are low.  If you must ride in low-light conditions, wear brightly colored, reflective gear and install a bright headlight and blinking red taillight for better visibility.

5. Give your brakes a break. Gently and firmly pump brakes at the same time.  Don’t squeeze the brakes too hard – and never squeeze the front brake first.

6. Know the rules of the road. Attach a rear-view mirror to your helmet, handlebar, or eyewear.  Ride with traffic, obey all traffic rules, and yield the right-of-way to pedestrians and other vehicles.  Observe your surroundings and communicate with drivers, using hand signals and eye contact.

7. What’s your hurry? If you’re out of shape or unaccustomed to riding, start slowly.  Thirty minutes on a flat terrain is a good way to start for the first few weeks.  Gradually work up to greater intensity and hillier terrain for better workouts.

8. Be kind to your body. Cycling should not involve stress or strain.  Keep your arms and shoulders relaxed and avoid locking your elbows.  Shift your hand and body positions frequently.

9. Share the ride. Riding with another person – or as part of a group – can motivate you to become a better cyclist and make the miles fly by more quickly.

10. Variety is the spice of life. Cycling should not be your only workout.  It is not a weight-bearing exercise, so be sure to vary your fitness routine with walking, weightlifting, and other activities.
TOPS Club Inc. (Take Off Pounds Sensibly), the original, nonprofit weight-loss support and wellness education organization, was established more than 63 years ago to champion weight-loss support and success.  Founded and headquartered in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, TOPS promotes successful, affordable weight management with a philosophy that combines healthy eating, regular exercise, wellness information, and support from others at weekly chapter meetings. TOPS has about 170,000 members in nearly 10,000 chapters throughout the United States and Canada.

Visitors are welcome to attend their first TOPS meeting free of charge. To find a local chapter, view www.tops.org or call (800) 932-8677.

photo credit: 123RF.com

If you are a small business owner that is still in business after the most recent economic downturn—that doesn’t mean you are out of the woods. There are many telltale signs that you need to consider, face the facts about the health of your business, and then come up with a strategy.

I owned a company that inevitably failed and remember the financial toll and the emotional beating that goes along with trying to save a company on its last legs. But, here are the 5 strategic moves I made which worked for me and I know can work for you. Here’s how to make the best out of a negative situation:

Tip 1: Face the Truth

• Is your company running a negative cash flow on a regular basis?
• If the answer is yes, it’s time to consider your options.
• Are you prepared to put more personal money into your business?
• If the answer is no, you probably will not be able to arrange a loan from any conventional sources and unless you can quickly turn around your cash flow you might run out of gas.

Tip 2: Maximize your Cash Management

• Can you stretch your payables further by negotiating longer payment terms?
• Can you speed up collection of your receivables?
• Can you reduce your operating expenses and furlough or convert employees to part-time workers?

Tip 3: Look Objectively at Hard and Soft Assets, and Customer Lists

• If you have been in business a few years, it is likely you have transferable assets with real value (actual and intangible) to a competitor.
• Examine your unique systems, formulas, and operating procedures that can add value to another company.
• Take a thorough inventory of everything the company possesses.
• Examine your customer list one customer at a time and consider how each customer would fit in with another similar company and whether you could convince them to make that transition.

Tip 4: Identify Competitors That Might Be Interested in Your Company

• The most positive solution to closing a business is to find another company that will benefit from what you have and will pay money (or assume debt) for it.
• Select no more than 2 potential targets( your best pics) because if the word gets out that you are selling your company you might lose customers and employees before you can work out a suitable transfer.
• Remember this is a “beauty contest” so plan every detail before you approach a competitor and keep it 100% positive
• Before you “pitch” a competitor know what you want out of the deal
• Keep your activities under the radar screen for maximum benefit

Tip 5: Know What you are Selling and Have Facts and Figures Ready

• Make sure you exchange confidentiality agreements before you start
• Give your best sales pitch on how your competitor will benefit by adding your company and its customers
• If there is real interest walk away with an agreed upon outline
• Follow-up quickly and try to wrap up the transfer in 30 days max
• Make the deal and take a long, hard, sigh of relief, as I did, that you can walk away with something to show for all your effort and then move on!

About the Author

Susan T Spencer is an entrepreneur, award-winning author of BriefcaseEssentials, lawyer, and former minority owner, GM and VP of the Philadelphia Eagles Football Franchise.  Spencer has spent the last 25 years owning and running her own companies in exclusively male dominated industries after turning her back on the “corporate world”.  Her stories and examples are authentic, and her advice for women in business, who own a company, or who are thinking about starting a business is direct, practical, pioneering, and barrier breaking. Spencer attended Boston University where she earned a BA. She later received her MA in Education/Economics from Hofstra University and received her law degree from Villanova University.

Photo credit: Michal Marcol

Pat Lawrence does not exist; it is part of the fiction. ‘Pat Lawrence’ is a pseudonym for our husband and wife writing team of PAT Adsit Burke and Daniel LAWRENCE Burke.

Our personal and professional collaboration began simultaneously when we met for the very first time. We were cast as husband-and-wife actors, George and Charlotte Hay, in Ken Ludwig’s hilarious play Moon Over Buffalo. At the end of the second act, Mr. Ludwig wrote a passionate kiss for the couple and for us, at that magical moment, the sparks flew and both our marital partnership and our business partnership were born.  (We are eternally grateful to Mr. Ludwig.)

We now own and run our own business: Murder-By-Design, live performances of interactive murder mysteries. After launching the enterprise we needed content so it was a natural evolution of our business partnership to co-author our murder mystery scripts. Six scripts later, we agreed to write a two-act comedy play based on actual comedic events in our lives and Squirrels In The Attic was born. (We’re delighted to report audiences have loved it.)

Since we enjoy reading taut, suspense-filled fiction (one of us reads aloud to the other), last year we decided to write our own novel and Jarred Into Being by Pat Lawrence, a roller coaster of a read by the way, was penned, published, and—we are delighted to say— is earning some wonderful five star reviews.

People often ask us, “How do you work together? How do you collaborate?”

• Do you each write a draft and then combine them?
• Do you write alternating chapters?
• Does one of you write the descriptions and the other write the dialogue?
• Do you sit and write every word together?

The answers to these questions are:  Not really, No, No, and Definitely Not.

Collaborative writing is like riding a tandem bicycle:  one author steers, but both authors provide the energy to move, watch to avoid the hazards, agree on which direction to turn, and settle on the final destination.

All of our collaborations begin with agreement on a single idea that serves as the overarching theme of the entire work. In Jarred Into Being the theme is: each individual’s life is profoundly influenced by the lives that intersect and surround it.  Next, we agreed on the major plot elements that would create an interesting story to illustrate that theme. In Jarred Into Being, a young girl’s loss of her parents places her in great peril because the characters now intersecting and surrounding her life want to possess her rather than protect her. The conflict in the novel arises out of the fact that our main character, Eva, is unwavering in her determination not to be possessed, and she continually battles for independence and freedom from the powerful and corrupt forces who would dominate her.

After those elements are settled, draft one begins in earnest.  We create the incidents and the characters that dramatize the main character’s plight. One of us (the partner who steers the bike to continue the analogy above) writes sections—maybe a chapter, maybe several—and submits those to the other partner. That partner reads, edits, searches for flaws, plot failures, and adds suggestions for additions or deletions and returns the sections to the other partner who incorporates the suggestions into the ongoing manuscript. That process continues section by section until we reach what we agree is a satisfying conclusion to the book; drafts two and three follow the identical path until the tandem bicycle reaches the end of its journey.

Ultimately, the most essential lesson we have learned is that the two most important words in a husband-wife collaborative business partnership are “Yes, dear.”

About the Author

Author ‘Pat Lawrence’ is actually the husband and wife writing team of ‘Pat’ Adsit Burke and her husband Daniel ‘Lawrence’ Burke – ergo: Pat Lawrence, pseudonym.

They began their writing partnership in 2007 penning Murder Mysteries for their entertainment enterprise, “Murder By Design.” Next, they graduated to a two-act comedy stage play, Squirrels In The Attic,” which has been performed in select venues in Wisconsin and Illinois and will next be performed in April, 2012 at the Beloit Civic Theatre in Beloit, WI.

Jarred Into Being, a contemporary suspense thriller, is their first novel together, but they promise it will not be their last. http://www.outskirtspress.com/jarredintobeing

photo copyright: 123RF.com

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Most people suffer with winter dryness and itch to a greater or lesser degree. It’s the combination of the cold weather outside and dry heat inside that affects the skin. The following tips, adapted from my book, Skin Rules, published by St. Martin’s Press can help.

Start Now!
Start coating your skin with a protective cream, lotion or oil now, before dry patches start to appear.  There are some extremely effective and inexpensive products that work just as well as the pricey ones. I always tell my patients to get a big tub of Aquaphor Healing Ointment for their bathroom cabinet, plus a smaller tube for their bags. It does an excellent job of protecting the skin barrier, and, by the way, it’s just as good for preventing dry, chapped lips. Put some on your hands before putting on your gloves and going out. A note about gloves: some people react to lanolin without realizing it. Use leather or synthetic material gloves and mittens instead of wool.

Two other top-notch products in the drugstore are Aveeno Active Naturals Stress Relief Body Moisturizing Lotion and Vaseline Intensive Rescue Clinical Therapy Skin Protectant Lotion. For those who want the simplest possible approach and don’t mind smelling slightly like a good salad, extra virgin olive oil left on overnight on the body and the lips also  works. I have patients who use a salad oil mister to spray themselves all over. If you have very dry skin, ask your doctor to prescribe Hylatopic Plus emollient foam and start applying it now. I particularly recommend it for anybody with eczema or very sensitive skin. It has no steroids, so patients can use it as long as they like.

Change Your Routine
Change your shower or bath routine. Ditch the scented and deodorant soaps which tend to dry the skin and use superfatted soaps or moisturizing body washes instead. Avoid prolonged baths and showers and don’t towel off completely. Make sure to apply all creams and lotions while the skin is still damp to bind the water to your skin.

Exfoliate
Gentle exfoliation removes dead skin and allows moisturizers to penetrate better. Those cheap, ruffled nylon poufs sold everywhere, even dollar stores, are useful things to have in the bathroom for body exfoliation. For the face, gadgets such as the Clarisonic skin cleanser machines and Olay’s Professional Pro-X Advanced Cleansing System are nice to have, but you can also exfoliate with a gentle cleanser and a cotton pad. If you use a washcloth, remember to use a fresh one every time you wash your face, which should be twice a day; the prospect of doing so much laundry is why many turn to cotton pads instead.

Invest in a Humidifier
A humidifier is one of the best investments against dry skin, but don’t wait until December to get one — start using it now. One caveat: humidifiers have to be cleaned regularly and without fail, I’d say every couple of weeks. People who have radiators can use a safer and cheaper method: just put a bowl, freshly filled with water, on the radiator every day.

© 2011 Debra Jaliman, MD, author of Skin Rules: Trade Secrets from a Top New York Dermatologist

Author Bio
Debra Jaliman, MD, author of Skin Rules: Trade Secrets from a Top New York Dermatologist, is a board certified dermatologist with a private practice in New York City. Internationally recognized for her research and work in clinical and cosmetic dermatology, Dr. Jaliman has a reputation for using cutting-edge technology and the latest in skin care, as well as for being the “last stop” doctor, the one who fixes what others can’t. She is an assistant professor of dermatology at Mount Sinai School of Medicine and a member of the American Society of Dermatologic Surgery. She is a spokesperson for the American Academy of Dermatology and is regarded as an authority in her field by journalists and cosmetics industry, appearing frequently on television and in publications such as the Wall Street Journal, the New York Times, Allure, Glamour, Self, and InStyle.

For more information please visit http://www.drjaliman.com/ and follow the author on Facebook and Twitter.

Several years ago I saw my cousin with her new, love-of-her-life husband, whom she met online. I had never seen her so happy. If my cousin, a 40-something divorced mother of two could find such wonderful match online, perhaps I could too. Little did I know I would meet my husband a day after joining an online dating service.

Before jumping into online dating I took some time to reflect on my past relationships. I had made many mistakes, routinely picking people who could not give me what I really wanted, settling for less, and blaming them for my dissatisfaction. I had suffered the consequences of trying to substitute low-fat love for the real-deal. Once I realized my own role in creating my “bad luck” I was ready to make some new luck.

I joined an online dating site and within hours was bombarded with countless emails from prospective suitors. As I started scrolling through the profiles of these gentlemen-in-waiting I was horrified. These men obviously had not read my profile!  For example, I already had a child but many of the men’s profiles indicated they never wanted children. I had also listed politics (and which party) as very important and many of these men were apolitical or wearing the wrong color on Election Day.

As I read on and on my horror only grew at my discovery: men weren’t reading my profile they were simply casting a wide net and likely emailing every woman within a certain mile radius and age range (my favorite was a 42 year old man only interested in meeting women 25-35). While it may have been easy to live in denial and just be flattered I had received an onslaught of emails, I didn’t have time for this. I had a career and a child and little time to skim through all of these inappropriate men, let alone to go out with them. I needed to take control.

Instead of going through a pile of emails from men with whom I was likely to have little in common, I decided to devote one day to looking at all of the profiles of men who met my search criteria. I then whittled down the large stack to three potential dates. Bear in mind, I didn’t think any of these men would necessarily be “the one” but I thought they would be worth hiring a babysitter and going out for a cup of coffee. I emailed two of the men, followed up by phone calls with each of them. After the phone calls I was only interested in a date with one of them. His name was Mark and we met the next day for brunch. It was a fabulous date. I never went out with anyone else and we were married two and a half years later.

While I realize my experience online is far from typical I am certain that my approach coupled with the value-system I employed on my date with bachelor-number-one led to my success in finding my great love. Here are my top four tips for meeting Mr. Right online.

1. Take control.

Instead of waiting to see who emails you, go through profiles on your own and take the lead in contacting men you’re interested in learning more about. Don’t be passive in your own life, take control—make your own luck instead of waiting to “be lucky.”

2. Use value-based search criteria.

When sorting through all the men in a 30-mile radius make sure to use value-based search criteria. Think about the kinds of things that make a true partnership over the long-haul such common interests and beliefs. What is important to you: politics, religion, education, etc.? If their sense of humor comes through their profile and tickles your funny bone that’s always a plus.

3. Profile pictures aren’t important.

We all know that attraction is actually the result of many factors—physical appearance, chemistry, and personality all come to bear. Yet by using profile pictures as a way to narrow down your list you are assuming attraction is based on physical appearance alone. You may wind up missing out on someone you could be really interested in. The only thing you can even begin to tell is whether or not he seems to have “kind eyes”—which is exactly what I thought about my then-future husband when I saw his picture.

4. Overlook the unimportant stuff and focus on the big picture.

Once you’ve developed your short list and you’re starting to date make sure to keep some perspective. It’s easy to get distracted by the small-stuff, like an odd eating habit or strange laugh, but these things are trivial. Focus on what really matters. Ask yourself the following: Does he seem like a good person? Does he strike you as genuine? Are you authentic when you are with him? Do you have good conversation? Can you envision having fun together? How do you feel when you’re with him? What does he bring out in you?

Remember happiness is a choice. Healthy relationships are based on the principles of partnership, not power, and they require two people who have self-respect so that they are able to respect and support another. Happy dating!

About the Author:

Patricia Leavy, PhD, is an acclaimed pop-feminist author and expert commentator as well as a leading qualitative and arts-based researcher. She is also the author of the new book, Low-Fat Love. For additional information visit: www.patricialeavy.com.

photo copyright: 123RF.com

If you are a new mother, you may be wondering what kinds of toys and learning devices will give your baby just the right amount of stimulation and what products will be overkill. Are you over-stimulating your baby?  The National Research Council has set forth research which shows the importance of stimulation on a baby’s development (social, cognitive, physical, and emotional stimulation). Studies have shown that extreme sensory deprivation and a lack of stimulation can have severe consequences on child development. However, even though stimulation is a good – too much stimulation can be a bad thing. As mothers, we want to be loved and accepted by our babies and we want to provide them with an abundance of learning opportunities – and as a result, we may provide them with too much stimulation at times.

Every baby is different; therefore you must consider your baby’s unique personality and temperament and be sensitive to your infant’s individual needs. Different babies can tolerate different levels of stimulation – so it is crucial to pay close attention to your own baby’s needs. For instance, some babies will be over-stimulated with music and mobiles in their cribs, while other babies may be soothed by them. Once you tune into your baby, you will be able to provide her with just the right amount of stimulation.

Signs that your baby may be overstimulated:

• Your baby looks away as you make sounds
• Your baby looks away when you try to make eye contact with her
• Your baby rubs her eyes and appears to be tired

What to do when you see signs of overstimulation:

• Provide your baby with space and quiet time
• Try using only 1 stimulus at a time (for example, make soothing sounds or touch, but do not do both simultaneously)

With the aim of providing babies with more learning opportunities, some parents purchase vocabulary DVDs. However, Doctor Dimitri Christakis demonstrated that babies are over-stimulated while watching these educational programs on television, DVDs, and videos, and that watching these things as babies has a detrimental effect on language development. According to studies conducted by Christakis, overstimulation results in babies learning fewer vocabulary words and having lower scores on language skills tests (10% lower than babies who have never watched television learning programs). Christakis claims that he witnessed the most damaging effects on language development in eight to sixteen month old babies. The most important learning experiences a baby can have are the result of face-to-face interactions with caregivers – not from DVDs. Studies have shown that face-to-face interactions with babies make them learn faster than they could ever learn by looking at a person speaking on a television screen. Learning programs on television have quick edits, and do not resemble the type of speaking parents use when they engage their infants in activities. Television and high tech baby learning products may over-stimulate your baby and detract from their learning.

We can provide babies with sensory stimulation in the following ways:

• Tasting and sampling different foods
• Listening to music, voices, and the sound of mother’s heartbeat
• Experiencing motion, such as rocking or swinging
• Looking at different objects and people
• Touching objects with interesting textures
• Smelling different things
• Holding your baby in your arms
• Swaddling
• Breastfeeding

There is a very thin line between stimulating a baby and engaging her curiosity, and over-stimulating her.  Parents should provide infants with opportunities to explore their environment and learn about the world around them, but at the same time they must protect their babies from overstimulation.  In order to do this, we must learn how to read our baby’s cues – this will enable us to know when our baby is interested in an activity, and when our baby is over-stimulated and craves her quiet time.

About the author:

Jacqueline Shaprow is an attorney, author, and graduate of Yale. She is a President and Founder of THE BABY SHOWER FOUNDATION, an organization that celebrates homeless and low-income women’s pregnancies with Baby Shower events. This organization provides these women with high quality baby care products and education so that they will feel prepared for motherhood. She has published motherhood articles and taught a course at a homeless shelter for pregnant women in Los Angeles that was featured on an ABC network television show. You can check out her foundation at http://showerfoundation.org/

photo: copyright 123RF.com

I am at the end of a 28-year marriage, with four grown children, one grandson and another on the way.  Hmmm, how did this happen?

As a stay-at-home mom for the past 28 years I have had to find things that made me feel important.  Everyone needs to have a sense that what they are doing has significance to someone even if that someone is oneself. Let me explain …

I’m a pj kinda gal in the A.M. hours of the day.  The first thing I do when I get out of bed is make it simply because I want to feel productive as soon as I rise in the morning, and I do.  The music comes on before anything else and I make a fresh pot coffee. Now my day has begun. “Love divine,” by Seal is one of my faves to start the day – the self-reflective lyrics put me in a good place. Adele has been a recent favorite as well, but my all-time fave is the “Spirit” channel on my Direct TV music menu.  Music has always played a big role in my life … lyrics being the key element.

After some good vibes at a nice decibel level, my mood is set.  The coffee is done, I throw in a load of laundry, grab my inspirational books, computer and my glasses, and I find a comfy spot to read and write.  Lately that has been by the fireplace in my dining room.  As I peer out the French doors, the sun begins to light the day, my garden awakens, and I thank the Almighty for a new day, another chance to make a difference. I open Oswald Chambers, “My Utmost for His Highest,” and here comes the beginning of inspiration for my mind.  I spend anywhere from 30 minutes to three hours a day reading and writing.  Now let me say, if it is an extended period of time, I for sure will get up periodically, fold a load of laundry, empty the dishwasher, and water my garden, all the things no one really notices. But I do, and that’s all that really matters. It helps to get me through a day that should otherwise be quite difficult.

The three greatest gifts in life have been, being a mom, a wife, and a servant of the Lord, the last being the greatest of these gifts and has blessed be beyond my wildest imagination.  Therefore, my primary key to success in the midst of catastrophic change is prayer and lifting my praises to God, who carries me.

The tools that help me through a bad day are really quite simple yet consistent and it’s that constancy that makes all the difference. Music, coffee, books, writing and most importantly prayer … let me not forget to mention, the abundance of friends God has blessed me with that I will always make time for. Friends are always a quick way to brighten any darkness, they help lighten the load when the burden seems too heavy.  When I’m down, my friends help me up.  Call a friend, be a friend!  Reaching for help is the only way to get help.  Don’t be too shy to ask for help … if you want to receive, you’ll need to ask.

photo credit: www.123rf.com

By Larry Deutsch, MD and Jeff Schweitzer, Ph.D. ~

The $40 billion weight loss industry has you hooked. Everywhere you look a weight loss guru is selling a pill or a program. Misinformation abounds. But help is on the way; real advice based on real science made easy.

Down to Calories

Every diet ever sold is nothing but a scheme to fool you into eating fewer calories. But reality is simple.  You just need to eat well, eat less, exercise and restructure your relationship with food.

Let’s go back to basics.  A calorie is a unit of energy. Nothing more.  One calorie of broccoli equals one calorie of chocolate. What matters is how many calories you eat. Whether eating chocolate or carrots, if you eat more calories than what your body needs to maintain itself, you will gain weight.

Let’s say you need 2,500 daily calories to fuel your activities and make the supporting materials your body needs.  Eat 2,500 calories and your weight will remain unchanged.  Chow down 4,000 calories; the excess 1,500 will convert to adipose tissue, stored for future use.  You get fat. Munch only 1,000 calories; your body converts the energy stored in fat reserves to make enough energy to fill the deficit of calories you didn’t eat. You lose weight.

Eat Less

Enjoy each morsel of food.  Put your fork down between bites. Set portion size before each meal.  No more “all you can eat” buffets. Remember to tell yourself, “this is what I have chosen to eat. I might as well extract every atom of pleasure and delight from each bite because when this is gone, I am done until the next meal.”

Plan meals: A good-sized meal, packed with fiber and proteins, can sustain you for hours.

Un-Supersize: Eat more often at home; think small when serving food.  Stop eating before you feel stuffed. Choose restaurants with normal size dishes or share your selection.

Drink water: Between juices, sodas and alcohol you can easily drink yourself fat. Water is the perfect hydrator and zero-calorie beverage. Water helps you nix hunger pains.

Practice mindful eating: If you wolf down your food watching TV, walking, checking your cell phone, reading email or calling friends you are likely to eat far too much.

Choose well

Losing weight means taking in fewer calories than your body needs; doing so in a healthy way requires that you choose well what you eat.

Aim for a balanced diet: Beware any diet emphasizing one food group over another. You need them all to maintain your body’s balance.  Eat foods that primarily come from a garden, an orchard, the ocean, or a farmer’s field.

Boost your fiber: Fiber can help you feel full, before you get fat. Fiber-rich foods like most vegetables and whole grains don’t produce the elevated insulin response, that for some people frustrates fat loss.

Eat low-energy-density foods: Energy-sparse foods like vegetables contain less energy than fried foods and sweets. Eat fruit, not fruit juice.  If you must eat ice cream then focus on control portion size. One small scoop is sufficient.

Eat foods that you enjoy: Eating well doesn’t mean depriving yourself. Eat what you love in moderation. Explore new foods.

Be Active

No magic pills can substitute for exercise. Weight loss depends on calories in versus calories out.  When playing couch potato you must significantly reduce consumption to maintain your weight.  The more we sit watching TV, at our desk, in the car, the more we eat. So we get fat.

Commit to exercise: Do not be ambitious.  Something, anything is better than nothing. Be realistic.  Sticking to your new routine is more important than the rigor of your exercises.  A commitment to do one minute of exercise daily, if you will actually do that one minute, is better than a 30 minute pledge that you don’t do.

Incorporate exercise into your daily routine: Walk every chance you get; exercise at your desk. Burn an extra 75 calories daily by taking stairs; park your car at the far end of the lot. The key is consistency. Consistent activity will keep you trim more effectively than becoming a weekend gym warrior.

Restructure your relationship with food

You are now on the road to a healthy lifestyle. You’ll eat less, choose well and be active. You need just one more final ingredient: restructure your relationship with food.  Life is stressful.  For many of us food is love, security, and reward.  You can learn to eat with pleasure only what you need. Master life without using food as a source of comfort and long-term weight loss becomes realistic.

Do these sound familiar?

• “I’m tired most of the time and I respond to the hit I get from eating the way I would to alcohol.”
• “When I’m bored, I eat.”
• “My kids/spouse/friends don’t eat well and I just go along with that.”
• “I think about food constantly – it’s a struggle not to.”
  

These common pleas feel real and are difficult to overcome, but you can.  Let’s see how.

Beyond will-power

Typical patterns that maintain an unhealthy weight:

• Snacking at night.
• Eating when stressed.
• Using food for reward or comfort.
• Eating when not hungry.

You can wrestle these habits to the ground with some well-proven techniques:

Self-monitoring: Keep an accurate daily food diary; know how many calories you eat.

Visualization: Imagine yourself eating healthy; walking away from a sweet you otherwise would not resist.

Meditation: Regular meditation can help reduce stress levels, minimizing the need to soothe yourself with food.

Hypnosis: Hypnosis can help those who want to lose weight but who alone cannot change their unhealthy eating patterns.

Now you have enough information to take your first step to better life.  Remember: weight loss depends only on reducing total calories in versus total calories you burn. Health depends on the quality of those calories. Eat well, eat less, exercise, and restructure your relationship with food.  Simple!

Jeff Schweitzer is a neuroscientist, former White House senior policy analyst and internationally recognized authority in ethics, conservation and development. For more information, please visit www.jeffschweitzer.com.

Larry Deutsch is a Family Physician and Medical Hypnotherapist with 38 years of experience helping patients lose weight, quit smoking and enhance their lives. For more information, please visit www.drlarry.com.

They are the co-authors of Calorie Wars: Fat, Fact and Fiction.